Charles Bukowski – Tales of Ordinary Madness (1983)

Short story collection…

About being a poet..

“Mommy, what ever happened to daddy?”
“He was a poet.”
“What’s a poet, mommy?”
“He said he didn’t know. Now come on, wash your hands, we’re having dinner.”
“That’s right, he didn’t know. Now come on, I said wash your hands…”

About the power of hopelessness

I picked them good – about 90 percent – but I had to see them first. I always chose the guy who moved around the least, who look like he didn’t want to fight, and if one guy gave the Sign of the Cross before the bell and other guy didn’t you had a winner – you took the guy who didn’t. but it usually worked together. The guy who did all the shadow boxing and dancing around usually was the one who gave the Sign of the Cross and got his ass whipped.

About being dirty

So each night I had to shit and then pluck the turds out of water, place them in wax paper and then into a brown paper bag and into my car and drive around town looking for some place to toss them.

And abstract dirtiness

Now, the female with a dirty kitchen is another matter – from the male point of view. If she is not employed elsewhere is childless, the cleanliness or dirtiness of her kitchen is almost always (exceptions be granted) in direct ratio to how much she cares for you. Some women have theories on how to save the world but can’t wash out a coffee cup. If you mention this to them, they will tell you: “washing out coffee cups is not important.” Unfortunately, it is. Especially to a man who has to put in 8 hours straight plus 2 overtime on a turret lathe.

And a little romance

We gad enjoyed our day. The movie had been bad, but we had enjoyed our day. We made our own movies.

Etc……………